2 A.M. Laser Tag

downloadLast night, well, this morning I got to play an exciting game of laser tag!  The game went on for a couple of hours and it should have been exhausting, but instead, it just got my mind racing!

Have you ever had the uniquely fun joy of a game a laser-tag? Since I have a nine-year old son, I have been fortunate to have had a recent experience with the game. And, it’s amazing how it so closely can be compared with insomnia, or at the very least, a restless night’s sleep, or really, a lack of sleep

Let’s back up a bit, shall we?

9:45pm:  Chapter read. Book closed. Kiddo tucked in.

10:00pm:  Lunches ready. Uniform ready. Backpack packed.

10:45pm: Pillows fluffed.  Alarm set. Messages checked.

11:00pm:  Lights out.  Close eyes. Sleeping begins.

2:00am:   Wake up! Wonder Why.

2:10am: Turn over. Fluff pillows.

2:17am: Still wondering. Turn again.

2:24am:  Check messages. Cruise Facebook. Ponder posting. Hold back.

3:10am: Get water.  Go potty [yes, I said potty]

3:47am: Get mad. Worry more. Take melatonin.

6:15am: Buzzer buzzes. Sandpaper Eyes. Need coffee.

As I lay there, wide awake, becoming quite familiar with my ceiling (it’s a nice ceiling…), I had this thought (actually, I had about 472 thoughts, I think – I lost count); about how a sleepless night can be compared to a game of laser tag.

See, you race down these dark alleyways, trying to dodge your opponent and earn points as you go.  You choose a path, and make a run for it, only to get zapped, tagged, hit! Oh no, turn and go another way, sure that your enemy will never find you down that pathway.

As my mind raced from worrying about one thing or another, I kept trying to redirect my thoughts to something else, something at least positive. With each attempt, the re-direct would simply bring me to a new shadowy and worry-filled corner.

Down one road were the unpleasant tasks I have put off for too long; the sharp right turn was the project at work waiting for me on Monday morning. Trying to dodge that bullet, I made a left turn and a mad-dash into regret over something I had said- and wished I hadn’t – earlier in a conversation.  Desperate to get off that channel, I backed up, and landed right in a heap of unfinished business. I stumbled, tripped and fell, sitting in that mess for far too long, and then managed to find my footing and keep running, only to run into remembering that I had forgotten to pay a bill that is due NOW!  Oh, and I remembered that I have CA Dreamin’ Travel Trivia results and winners to post.

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The mind is a dangerous place!

You’d think that all that running and thinking and dodging and worrying would wear me out; instead it just seemed to add some fuel to the mental fire and the game just went on and on and on. And on. Some would say I got my money’s worth out that game!  I knew when I drifted off in my melatonin-induced sorta-kind sleep, at last, that morning would arrive with a vengeance.  And it did.  Two visits to Starbucks today and I am inching – ever so slowly – closer and closer to 5pm.

I have just one thought for tonight.

zzzz_trans

Sweet dreams…

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24 thoughts on “2 A.M. Laser Tag

  1. I’ve never thought of insomnia as laser tag before … but I’m going to now, every time I’m awake and staring at the clock! Loved this visual Bon, so much fun! I hope the rest of your week goes more smoothly and you can get some (well deserved!) rest xoox

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    • Ok, next time you have a night like that, just imagine that I am in there playing laser tag with you! And instead of zapping, we just sit down and start talking about something fun! xo

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    • Thanks Lori…and yes, a good sleep last night, dreams and all. I *may* have even overslept a little. 😉 Hoping your tossin’ and turnin’ was just virtual and not real! xo

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  2. Okay…know it makes sense and I can see we are all in good company. What IS this cycle we are all in…we are each going through our own challenges right now…but not all are bad, so that’s not all of it. Do you think it’s (ahem) perhaps (cough) maybe (shhhh) age related?

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    • A crazy cycle for sure!! Oh, you had to go and bring up age?! No, can’t be possible, just not. What, trying to give me something else to worry about? 🙂 Go take a nap! 🙂

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  3. Well, I’ve never played laser tag, but I am familiar with the pinball game of sleepless nights and relentless thought. I like your analogy better. It’s cooler somehow – and that doesn’t surprise me one bit. I hope you can unplug long enough to get in some good sleep honey..xox

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    • I had a feeling that, unfortunately, you would totally relate to this. The relentless thought is an apt description! So frustrating, but appreciating that this was but ONE night, not a string of many, and appreciating that in the midst of it all, the laser-tag image came to mind – and stayed long enough for me to turn it into an analogy! I know sleep is in short supply in your neck of the woods, so I take that Z and raise it to ZZZZZZ and send your way! xo

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  4. great picture at the end! Hope you get a good night’s sleep tonight. I had about a year of chronic insomnia a year or so after my oldest was born and it was tough. Seems the more you try to sleep, the more impossible it is to do so. My trick now is to be exhausted all of the time so I can sleep whenever wherever.

    Love that you compared it to laser tag. Clever 🙂 You had me going there for a while.

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    • Hi Liz! thanks..the laser-tag connect was the prize of a sleepless night, and funny to think I had you going, that almost makes it all worthwhile! I slept soundly last night, happily, and today my head is much clearer! I can’t believe you survived a year of chronic insomnia, that just awful, someone else I know has gone through that. So hard! I guess your trick makes sense, if you just run yourself in every direction, then yes, you should be able to sleep when/where ever! Cheers to the zzzzz!

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    • I am so sorry!! They say misery loves company, but in this case, would prefer that others are not having nights like that! Wishing you rest, and peace, and a quiet mind.

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