Abundantly Inadequate

We are all readers or writers here, and in some cases, both.  In short, we are no strangers to words. Their power, their play and their partnership when we need or want to express ourselves in some way. We write blogs, books, poems and songs; we pen memos, letters, missives and lists. Daily.  We engage in witty banter, endless text threads, singing song lyrics and reciting movie lines.

But, sometimes we come face to face with a situation where it seems that the right words, or any words for that matter, are on par with the amount of water here in California.  Simply not enough.

We’ve all been in the situation with someone who’s facing a tragedy, or they have received terrible news, enduring a heavy load with no end in sight, or grieving, missing and mourning when someone is no longer. Simply lost.

Face to face with these moments, we are moved. We feel deeply and when our emotions course through us and rise up out of the belly, we can find that the words are absent. Simply not there.

A light bulb flickered for me this morning while getting ready for work. A different way to think about this. While standing in front of my bursting closet I had that all too familiar and frustrating feeling of, I have NOTHING to wear!

emptyFor all of the infinite possibilities afforded us by the English language, sometimes it’s like that feeling of standing before your first-world over-packed closet.  Hanging there are all of those blouses, cardigans, shirts and pants.  In those fraught face-to-face moments, hanging there are all of those verbs, nouns, adjectives and prepositions, yet somehow it feels abundantly inadequate. Simply not enough.

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20 thoughts on “Abundantly Inadequate

    • HI Sandy Sue, Yes! I am still here! I have just hit a major dry-spell with my writing, unfortunately. Why does that happen? I miss it and at some point, I trust the mojo will return! Thank you so much for checking, appreciated more than you can know. Hope all is well with you. B

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  1. Acceptance of our limitations and the awareness that there are no words…some of the best conversations are held in silence when being actively present to the other (and yourself too). Sometimes I struggle for words because I haven’t allowed myself to just feel helpless. You have grasped a mountain full of awareness, expressed it beautifully, and anyone who has your friendship has indeed found a treasure. As far as nothing to wear, I get your drift, but you got that Charming Charlie gift card to do something about that. Otherwise, I’m at a loss for words as David K. already said it so well 😉

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  2. Ahhh yes, words….sometimes our greatest ally, sometimes slinking off into the night when you need them most. When I find myself at a loss, I resort to gestures–a smile, a hug, a shrug, a wink. I think the desire to connect comes through, words or not. And for what it’s worth, sunshine, I think your “closet” would give Kim Kardashian’s a run for its money…. Xoxox, l

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    • I agree Sandy Sue – I think my angst came from the fact that there was no in person moment…a hug is even harder to convey via fiber optic lines. Sigh…

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    • Ah, Liz, thank you for the vote of confidence. Sometimes, though..it’s like the empty thought bubble. Nothin’. I got nothin’. Thanks for the first paragraph love! 🙂

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  3. And I will never look at my closet the same again! (I can’t wear that verb with that noun….I need a new adjective!) But yes….I find my words are often…”I have no words”….but they are from my heart. As are yours…. love you revelations, BonBon. ♥

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  4. On being on the other side of this and receiving the words of comfort. I was amazed at how a simple word of love blessed me and helped me through the hardest of times. I remember it and so I try to comfort with words on a card or in person when I can. It easier to write it down. Also hugs go a long way if you have nothing to say.

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    • I really appreciate your perspective…so glad you shared from your side of this. Being on the receiving end. I think when on receiving end, we feel what is behind the words more than the words themselves perhaps but maybe forget that when we are on the side of trying to find and summon the words, sometimes the feeling(s) make it even more challenging to find them. Just thinking out loud! Your perspective got me thinking!

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  5. Our limitations with the English language-like finding the perfect pair of jeans. Impossible to find when you want them most. But don’t underestimate yourself honey – you are far better outfitted than most…:-). Xoxo

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    • Thank you…I smile. It’s a great analogy with the perfect pair of jeans – impossible to find indeed. Feeling rather bedraggled today, and definitely not all put together. xoox

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  6. So true Bon. At times, even the words we do find don’t do our feelings justice, but all those times, those words always manage to be enough. It’s the love behind them, the compassion with them, that really matters. (The closet? Really? LOL….the way our minds work is an amazing thing!) xoxoxo

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    • Yes, the closet. Really. Helped me re frame it…we think nothing is there, and yet maybe we just need to match up different pieces in different ways when the usual combinations don’t work. Or, decide it’s ok to show up in our sweat pants and not get it all right. It’s true, the love behind them is what truly counts. You’ve had need for lots of good words lately – i hope they came to you in spades. xoxo my friend

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